9.17.2001

i'm eating string cheese for sorrows.
there is a strange little red bug creeping across the desk top. i want this bug to be my friend.
i find sexiness in a boy bending over the engine of his car.
today was a blur and all i remember was the sixty year old man singing "area codes" and "batter up" for us as he pulled some old skool moves for us.
ben and ali have boyfriends at the same time, so i feel a little lonely.

me and chuck talk about having a friend for all the time. someone from dusk shadows to midnight moonlight to bright sun rising and dusty afternoons to damp gray day. i want someone to keep my bed warm. a soft amber rim surrounding so close soft cheeks pressed against white pillow and subtle stand out eyes, looking into the face of a friend for all times, while arms wrap around bare skin or soft worn cotton dress shirts. imagine the familiar beauty of knowing smooth lips and every curve and arch. a hand to hold in the dark. someone to read good books outloud with by lamplight and closed blinds is going to make me happy for the rest of my life.
currently spinning: ash: girl from mars