while proceeding to have a solo dance party i managed to smash a lightbulb with an all but empty vodka bottle. that vodka has been sitting there for months. it's not even mine, but i guess it is now. maybe i should just drink it in the a.m. before school one day, b/c it would be hilarious to have vodka breath.
the music up until till this point has been overly experimental and house of jealous lovers get a kiss of approval.
it's hot in here and i'm being cheap so as not to use the a.c undies and tank top party!
this satrurday, party at the rents. it'll be the party i never had in h-school.
las night i saw mr. kevin hauser and tuan at the creative research lab for the grad student exhibition and ate pesto with bread and cream cheese and looked at pretty brigth paintings and huge installations.
how long can you go on doing the same shit?
i'm glad to be leaving the country. maybe i can stalk david sedaris and take hundreds of pictures and leave everything else behind. it's not the same. the apartment is empty aside from the futon, a lovely rocking chair and a mobile of birds. my room is cluttered leaving me in the constant state of being unsettled. i want to move away, but there's still some school left to do. and then what?
my undies have an airplane on them. there's a balsa wood flyer hanging from the ceiling and my airplane painting on the wall. i think everything is pointing to getting the hell out of here.
it's strange how things change and how sometimes i blame myself and sometimes hwo i blame the other people.
a decorative can of lonestar and a half consumed box of candy cigarettes.
my daddy hasn't called yet. i want to go eat with him for my birthday and buy my plane ticket. there's an old black jamaican woman going to vienna with my class. i think i want her to be my new friend. i bet she's awesome.
i bet nick is still typing his notes up, but when i get back over he'll be done and i still haven't started.
we lounged on the rocks of a creek i discovered over spring break. watching water flow by languidly and the sun flashing out between the new green leaves and occasional cloud. fishies are easily fooled into eating rocks, but they spit them out. which if you ever have the chance, is hilarious to see.
last night we sang songs.


my birfday came and went. i felt old and got to dance on top of a bench in a restaurant where someone shouted out, "shake what your mama gave you" despite that i was eating with her. a subscription to nylon, tickets to air, a book that guy wrote and illustrated and some bubu lubu.
i heart rediscovering shit i forgot about. aka the impossibles.
i finished middlesex in the course of a very lazy, very quiet spring break and started up the new dave eggers. mr. eggers read us a funny story when he was on book tour. i bought the book and had him draw a dog in it to remind me of the sotry he wrote for the nick hornby collection that was awesome.
took a dog for a walk every evening and held hands with littleman.


this past weekend was soft grass, a sheet and reading books with littleman. it was nice and warm and pretty. dogs barked from the nearby dog park. guitar and harmonica beatles renditions in the corner of the park. i was full of smiles.
i love veronimommy and ben aqua.
i <3 natalie and her bowling shoes.
i love johnny and his thupid fathe.
mmm almond macaroons and fity bagels. honey butter and cream cheese.
'ey, was dat a faht or a person that said dat? cuz it smells so bad. me and johnny want to heckle sxsw travellers. actually he wants to do a performance piece, perhaps a cover of the dj assualt classic "ghetto shit" and i'm butting myself in with my casiotone and lame ass disses.
tuan taught us how to screen print. and the screen print has a pony on it and is pink and yellow. and it says "design oh yes!" tuan is my favorite professor. he had pieces of tape on his shirt and his khakis were covered with ink. thus exhibiting that he is in work mode(and it's been awhile). fucking genius. rick and caren and paul and i spent the tuesday class period using tracing paper and pencils to illustrate the master pages of magazines. our project for the rest of the semester is to make a book.
it's freezing and i bought a new red zippie sweatshirt. it still smells like store. i like to stick my nose to my shoulder and sniff. sweet and woody.
i have goosebumps and i want some tea.
earl gray with milk and sugar. wrap my hands around the mug to warm my fingertips.
i <3 the new her space holiday.
soul is the new awesome.
i know you want to leave me, but i refuse to let you go.
me + nick = team dracula awesome to the maxxiest
date at vespaio with yummies and a citrusy dessert. holding hands and making kaleidiscopes at amoa with natalie. who took our heights with colored pencils. jim hodges. folding (into a greater world). just this side. a curtain of silk flowers. colored lightbulbs. and tiny mirrors.
at least i'm not a fucking crazy bitch.


i feel like an adult when i give directions b/c i sound oh so informed.
i'm also a member of our national public radio affiliate.
and i still love chips.
mint tea reminds me of brussels.