it seems like recently everyone has been writing truly touching pieces about graduating. i on the other hand have not been hit by this magnitude and am looking forward to a lazy arse summer. maybe i'm growing far too "eh" about everything in life. i like to believe that once i get out of school, i'll be back to the non-drained exciting person i was in the fall. it's bland right now...and lacking adventure. maybe i can run up the train tracks to find a dead body. i feel very closed off, but clingy at the same time. and it's depressing to think that "these are the best years of your life". that would suck if it were true. i doubt it though. i'm sure i'll have much more fun avoiding work and scheming up get rich quick ideas. an hour and a half is a long time. how long would i feel bad without them?
words scrawled in green pen and written by a special teacher in a fresh book of ancient memories, a.k.a. a yearbook, "if there is one piece of advice i can add, it's that you should find out what makes you happy in life but never worry that your choice is final. you are intelligent and adaptable, and you should always be...changing."
an admirable aquaintance demanded, "make your own path, live your life and kick some ass, girl."
and my hero wrote simply, "i love you."
it's strange that the people i hardly know told me the best things. it's fuckin' candy for the brain to feast on. past the "have a great summer" and "wow, the school year went by quickly". i dig the individuals in life.
"i'm definitely shaking."
we might go out tagging tomorrow. it'll be nice to add a piece of color on a beige cement block or a cold metal pole.
i just wanted him to hold me. b/c when it gets late and the music fills the darkness of the house, i get sad. dragging your feet in the dirt makes for a crappy time, i suppose. i need him sometimes. and i don't want the damn tears to well up. this morning, i saw a bird lying on his back, but he was still moving. and i felt terrible. i hope the bird is still alive and now upright. b/c birds are meant to fly.
certain song remind me of people. i think of our kiss underneath the streetlight and whispering in his ear as i wobble on tip toes, maybe it's driving in the country with them or dancing stupidly in pajamas at two in the morning. god, it's the simple things. it's romantic in the dark.
let the wind whisper sweet nothings.
pedro the lion sang last night. and we nearly fell asleep to the voice of breezes through trees that play with wind chimes subtle and yet so rich.