7.28.2002

i hate when people smoke, it's like steaming shit flowing from the nostrils and being blown in the air for other people to inhale nasty halitosis. and then there are the kiddos that smoke around the kiddos that can't breathe. i can reassure the world that not being able to breathe when you kind of have to hurts like a bitch and makes you want to cry. having to rush home and talking to yourself about calming down while your throat is on fire and your eyes tear up. and the throat sucks air desperately going in for an inch and a half at the base of the neck b/c you just can't get the air. so maybe i don't have a grandparent that died of lung cancer or emphyzema, but why can't i say anything? i too love the tarry residue on filters of stubby burnt cigarettes. and being like, hey, that would really look hot on the inside of my body. i love when the kids with history of lung problems choose to smoke even though someone close to them spent their last few years hooked up to a breathing machine. h-o-fuckin-t. and i love when people spend lots of money a week to support some huge ass killing machine corporation. god damnit, why can't i be one of the cool kids that smoke to form an image? yeah, it is an image for some people. oh, or to keep me company when i'm alone rather than learning to deal with myself. i only wish to be so lucky. stupid fuckers.
end of rant.