1.16.2002

the bus ride home from our school field trip. i watched the sun create shadows on your face and the wind through the windows blew your hair out of place.
jovitas on the south east side. looks like a warehouse converted into a restaurant with few lights but good food and pretty murals. serve me chips y salsa, por favor. must have been office party night. let the thirty-fourty year old women get loose on the dance floor in front of a white singer who thrusts his pelvis at the ladies while wearing tight black jeans. god save me. the white men decide to "get funky" with the women, flailing limbs and nodding to the the beat as the women shimmy and twist excitedly. i swore that i would become them so i could look embarassing as i sipped the margarita i brought out onto the dance floor. yee-fuckin'-ha. we created scenarios for them...the women wearing the expensive black polo near the pole will not dance tonight. she sat there with her arms crossed and then out of nowhere she's dancing on the floor with one of her co-workers. we deduced that she has a monster crush on him. he is the only one that can get her to look so dumb and he doesn't even know it. and the cowboy across the room reckons some purdy lady or gentleman will ask him to dance. he'll tip his hat and consent.
i'm not in love with everybody, contrary to the popular belief. i find people beautiful in many ways. fixated on the possibility of seeing this beauty everyday is where it all comes from. i step back though...eventually...to appreciate it in a different way.