12.25.2002

i find myself driving between destinations after midnight on christmas eve, singing along to belle and sebastian and sondre lerche. pirate pajama pants barely cover my cold legs and i am covered in an oversized wool coat. the highway is empty and i share my voice range with nico. tomorrow we will get on a plane and fly to a foreign country but right now, right now i am resting in bed under flannel sheets and a gray blanket with triangles. i'm supposed to go to sleep so santa can come and leave our gifts under the tree and because my dad will get here at nine am. your voice is beside me in a blue telephone and you are far away. the heater is on and the dog is snoring while i read him selections from frog and toad are friends (the lost button) and frog and toad all year (christmas eve). it's nice to hear his voice. and i hate that people tell me we're joined at the hip.
we all spun under the lights and i keep my eyes forward so that someone else can look up and see the swirls of colors and we won't fall over on top of each other quite as quickly as the average couple spinning. ben did a good job this year and it was brian's first. alison and i struck regal pony poses and placed our hands to our heads like antlers. natalie ate a funnel cake while johnny stole some and anthony drank hot cider.
gabe got back to his texan roots, coming back to austin with newly acquired cowboy hat, cowboy boots and a suede leather shirt.
we spend the night together every night and we snuggle under the covers.
little girls named laura are precious when they are on your side helping you destroy their brother.
ben is being overcome by alter-ego marcel witha hot and sexy rendition of mr. grinch. i wouldn't touch you with a thirty nine and a half foot pole. well maybe i would, if i had a little zima in me.
we've spent nights dancing . one at boyz cellar.
aww shucks, pop. you are the beauty to my beast.
there are tins full of cookies and daddy took us out to eat. he let me order lobster spaghetti. and got excited about the white chocolate raspberry cheesecake that my sister ordered.
fart when you are unaware your daughter is about to leave a message for a friend and it may become apparent that your gas problems and sassy comments afterwards are now upon a stranger's voice box. we giggled about that until our eyes teared up.
i want to kiss brian a lot.
maybe i'm not the genius of the bunch. three b's and an a. but i liked it. i've got toy babies, what do you have?
freee your mind like en vogue said.
i might get to do winter things if i go to albuquerque...with snow and stuff.
i will be back on the thirtieth at a five pm that will seem like an eleven pm. i got my first passport.